Don't like me? have a seat with the rest of the bitches waiting for me to give a fuck.

I drove my ex over the edge. I survived.

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by selling my car.

So you want me to tear down the walls that you helped create? you better bring a jack hammer asshole

Do not underestimate my ability to claim insanity

Dude, suckin at something is the first step to being sorta good at something

I have a drinking problem

What's all this right to bear arms? I gotta right to people arms. and I like mine with ketchup

I appreciate your help around the house, but we I asked you to knock out the cobwebs this isn't exactly what I had in mind

Sometimes I question my sanity, but the unicorn and gummy bears told me I'm fine!

Self-breaking cars. so you can get back to texting

Malapit na mag new year. ihahanda ko na yung PLA PLA. yung PLA-PLAnuhing buhay kasama ka