Joke All You Can

Sunday, September 14, 2014

These Two Pictures Show December. Panda December Jokes
Remember the twenty extra years you added to your life through clean healthy living? well these are them
I've decided to teach her to talk, what harm can it do?
Don't be mad because I don't care anymore. be mad because I once did, and you were too blind to see
Please, continue to call me a bitch while I search for a fuck to give
What do a pregnant woman, frozen beer, and burned pizza have in common? an Idiot who forgot to take it out in time
I've been so stressed recently I've been doing that Chinese thing with the needles, you know.. heroin
Behold! the field in which I grow my fucks Lay thine eyes upon it and thou shalt see that it is barren
I'm not an asshole. I am actually one of the nicest people you will ever meet. you are just pissed because I can see through your bullshit
Confession : when I was still married. I had a feeling he was cheating on me. I found a pack of condoms in his car. The box was already opened so I poked a hole in the wrapper of each one.

Confession : when I was still married. I had a feeling he was cheating on me. I found a pack of condoms in his car. The box was already ...

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