Eskiho = A girl wearing a short and skirt and ugg boots. A weather confused whore.

2 pieces of advice Never laugh at your wife's choices; you are one of them. Never be proud of your choices; your wife is one of them.

You can't face the problem, if the problem is your FACE.

Sometimes I pretend to benormal. But it gets boring. So I go back to being ME.

The proper skirt length is at least two inches below your cellulite

I see, so if I don't have sex with you I'm a prude bitch, if I use the pill I'm a slut, if I get pregnant I'm an idiot and if I choose abortion I'm Satan. yay

Real Women don't label themselves as dimes, barbies or bad bitches, because real men don't carry around loose change, play with toy dolls or wife dogs

It's international Women's Day! let's burn our bras! just kidding.. my boobs are big and I need this

Sometimes, it takes balls to be a Woman.

Females with an "A" in their fist name are said to be more beautiful, intelligent and live longer

Theres the pretty girls.. and theres the popular girls.. and I look like a Potato. A Kawaii Potato

If you can't handle me at my Amanda Bynes, you don't deserve me at my Beyonce

I'm not playing hard to get. I'm playing " I don't want you"

Never irritate a Woman who can operate a backhoe

Hey, babe.. I'm in the hospital. I got my leg injured at work and paula brought me here. doctors say I might lose my leg. Who's paula?

I'm not always right, but when I am it's usually all of the time

Actually, I like being pale. I don't need to look like a worn out leather handbag to feel good about myself

I don't want to seem like I think I'm always right, but I am and that's why it comes across that way.

Sometimes I wonder what she has that I don't and then I realize, probably herpes

Anything you say will be used against you, in an argument, 11 months from now. because I'm a woman, and we never forget anything. Ever.